Today, I’ll continue with a discussion about the perils of watching movies at home with the children. I’ll cover the embarrassment of violence, pornography and bad language.
As for violence, Donna and I haven’t wanted our kids to be over-protected, so we’re pretty liberal in our viewing habits. Besides, you can’t get away from the violence in many historical movies. Plus, this also applies for most science fiction and comic- or graphic-novel-based films.
However, there’s hacking and slashing with a modicum of flare and sometimes even a touch of humour; but then there’s also blood and gore that can stray over into perversion. If you haven’t seen the movie before, you’re often on edge about which direction it’s headed.
Then there’s the sex, which is fine by me when it’s just Donna and I watching. But when the kids are in the room, it’s another matter. As the scene onscreen unfolds and the action heats up, I’m thinking, “No, keep your tops on.” Then, “No, keep your pants on.”
Sometimes, I’ll hear a little voice asking, “What are they doing now, daddy?” I’ve got my eyes half closed, praying for the scene to end, but it never does quite quickly enough. We hurriedly send the kids to bed upstairs, only to call them back down again in a minute or two, when it seems that the viewing coast is clear. Fifteen minutes later, we’re doing the same dance again. It’s all very stressful.
Finally, there’s the matter of the language in some movies. I’m easy when it comes to the sex, the violence and most language, on the grounds of being somewhat pretentious about my love for “art”. But in some movies, my goodness, the swearing and foul language go beyond anything I ever want to hear again. You need a shower, an ear de-waxing and a shiatsu treatment to ever feel clean and restored again.
What does sometimes work with the kids is old (i.e., even before my time) movies with a plot and some interesting characters. Tom enjoyed Bette Davis and Joan Crawford in Whatever Happened to Baby Jane? And Laura with Clifton Webb, Dana Andrews and the heart-breakingly beautiful Gene Tierney was another winner.
Ted howled his way through A Night at the Opera with the Marx Brothers. He couldn’t resist Harpo’s demented shenanigans.
Most of the time it is terrific to sit down as a family and watch a movie on TV. But occasionally there are those moments when I just want to jump into a hole or hide under the covers. At those times, my only concern is, “How can I explain this aspect of the world to my children without seeming like too much of a dinosaur?”
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For Part 1 of this story, please click here.
Here’s a story with some intriguing plot twists, written specifically for a flash fiction contest. The challenge? To be less than 600 words. Borderline with Blemishes.
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